It's 116 degrees out today.
And cloudy and humid.
When I stepped out the door after work, I actually groaned, "Oh, Jesus."
When I say "It is literally an oven out there," it's not because I'm one of those assholes who uses the word "literally" to mean "not literally". It's because today at work we had a potluck, and the people who brought hot food just left it in their cars until lunchtime to keep it warm.
When I got in my car I burned myself on the turn signal -- and I'd had a shade in my windshield all day. On my way home, I was relieved when I got close enough to see that whatever's on fire and billowing a huge cloud of smoke into the sky is a good ways northwest of my house.
Tomorrow's forecast is 119. Which, well, I guess the good news about when it gets up to 119 degrees is it's probably not going to get any hotter. (Phoenix's all-time record is 122, and that was 23 years ago.)
And while the humidity is awful, it also means the monsoons are coming and we won't have to put up with this shit for much longer.
And the other good news is, I have made it back to my air-conditioned home and I have no reason to step outside again for days.
My pants are off, and they are staying off.